A Words – Altruism and Asceticism
Posted on January 7, 2008
Filed Under cheapskates, debt, milestones, resolutions, snark | 8 Comments
It’s been an inspired start to ‘08. Without making any real resolutions because I am, as I’ve said before, nearly perfect, it’s still been hard to resist the betterment challenges that are out there in the blogosphere these first days of the New Year. First there’s Jen over at One Plus Two challenging her audience to throw off the yoke of computer activism and actually make a real difference in the world. It’s a put your politics and your social conscience where your keyboard is sort of challenge, it’s an urge to action, it’s a y’all get on out there and make a difference in the world each week, each month, even each day if you’re so inclined. To meet Jen in her tireless efforts to help the homeless and the disenfranchised would be epic. To just sort of spend a few hours a week doing something even marginally significant seems the least I can do, and so, I’ve taken the bait and sent off an application to volunteer with Elder Services.
And I have to report that I’m more than a little stymied by the thorough reference list I’ve been asked to provide. Having been sitting in front of a home computer for two years, it’s almost an impossibility to come up with three relevant business or community references that can speak of my relative sanity. I suppose the mail man knows I’m reliable in that I answer the bell when it is rung and I often put the flag up on the mailbox when sending out-going letters. The neighbor can be contacted as to my strict adherence to schedules. My lawn gets mowed on a regular basis. I’ve been known to fertilize and apply lime supplements. I’ve got general yard maintenance standards and this should count for something.
It’s shame My Better Half can’t write a recommendation as I’m sure he’d be glad to enlighten the management over at Elder Services as to my unyielding and dogmatic nature. It would read something like this, “CCE is an individual with steady resolve and unwavering expectations. It is she, after all, who plagues me day in day out about placing clothes in the hamper and dishes in the dishwasher and not wearing my slippers out of doors. It is she who practically wrote the book on industry and perseverance in the face of household dirt and pet hair on the couch. CCE has an expert’s sense of when to tighten the reins in order to suppress disorderly conduct. She has no problem doling out rebukes and maintaining order with well timed sighs and ominous silences. She’s no stranger to emphasis and will slam drawers and doors with impunity.”
Or perhaps one of you, my loyal readers, could make a pitch for my professional worth. After all I am here day after day, entertaining the five of you with haphazard words slung sloppily across the web page. You could mention that my typos are only occasional and that my story choices are sometimes amusing and, occasionally, maybe once or twice, actually border on brilliance.
And while I’m suffering my charitable-block with dignity, I contemplate Mad Hatter’s willingness to throw off the chains of commerce and consumption and give it all up for eight weeks of self-imposed asceticism. She dangles the challenge before the rest of us, taunting us to join her in the decision to buy only necessities for the next two months, sixty days of nothing but groceries and medicine and gas. And I think, hell yeah, why not? It’s not too different from the reality I’m already living. With little spare change rattling around in the MadMarriage coffers, every non-essential purchase is dissected and discussed and the source of great dissension.
I’m willing to pass the local Starbucks with nary a wave, to fill my own thermos with tap water before the daily trip to the gym, to eat lunch at home and snack from the cupboard. But I have some unanswered questions. Is it only products that I must eschew or is it service as well? My confusion and apprehension stems from the impending need for a hair cut and highlights, from the spousal b-day looming on the horizon of mid-January, from the weekly fee required to secure court time for a Sunday match, from a dentist appointment, the first for G in nearly a year, from the fact that the babysitter will surely want dollar bills not a dozen home-made cookies after her evening here with the kids on the 18th.
Does the bottle of wine we like to consume on weekend nights count as a grocery item or is this something we must give up in the bargain? Does the download of the new Lenny Kravitz MP3 release count as consumerism or is it art appreciation, particularly because the required transaction takes place in the ether of the internet…no packaging, no immediate exchange of cash just a future credit card bill and one new song on the MP3 player?
Having no answers to above the questions, here’s the best I’m willing to do…no cosmetics, no clothes, no gifts to self (like scented candles or house plants or cut flowers or new novels), no bottled waters or cafe coffee, one meal out a week and only a cheap, non-fancy meal at someplace only a rung up the ladder from fast-food, one bottle of wine a week, one gift for my suffering spouse unfortunate enough to have been born just three weeks post-X-mas, only school supplies for the kids, (stuff like erasers and notebooks and glue sticks), no dreams of new furniture or rugs or refurbishments of bathrooms until March, one evening out on the 18th while employing a sitter at home who will be paid in cold hard cash, one trip to the salon to hide the roots and get my ritual 12 week styling. ( I swear I won’t do it again for another 12 weeks. I think I deserve congratulation on my willingness to go 3 months without a haircut. I know women and men who insist of five weeks, some even four. I’m a hair hero in comparison), one additional day on the tennis court a week (my two day minimum has already been paid for, everything else is cake), no MP3 downloads for the entire 8 week period (did I say none, maybe I meant one but we’ll see how it goes). So there, I’m out of breath and out of time but I’ll fill you in on any other exceptions I think of along the way. Will the eight week period of anti-consumerism help the bottom line? Probably not a whole lot seeing as we’re already keeping things pretty spare, but it’s a good exercise, a thoughtful pause before slapping down the card is always a good thing. Here’s hoping it’s not too painful.
Any challenges you all feel like sharing while I’m in the competitive mood?
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