i’m lucky
Posted on April 16, 2007
Filed Under marriage, kids, parenting, suburban joys |
It occurs to me after a weekend spent with my in-laws eating loaves of incredibly moist Russian tea loaves and showing the kids Buster Keaton films and noshing on huge quantities of Indian food and reading Harry Potter to the children, chapter by chapter interrupted by cups of tea and more Russian tea loaf, that I am incredibly lucky. Aside from the hoarding tendencies that appear to have a genetic component, my in laws are special. To them, art is something worth inquiring after, something one works for and stretches towards, not something that matches carpet or the couch. On Saturday we spent two happy hours at an art gallery watching William Wegman’s video installations that didn’t necessarily include dogs or plot or anything beyond oddities and puzzling amusements.
For them film does not need to feature Sandra Bullock or Tom Cruise to be worthy of a few hours attention and perhaps is best when devoid of Sandra Bullock or Tom Cruise. They do documentaries, they do Sherrybaby, they do Tarentino and Shopgirl and Reds. Most importantly they do subtitles. On Saturday night we watched Spike Lee’s Documentary When the Levees Broke and collectively railed against a government that would allow such shameful neglect.
On Sunday we woke to rain and ice and all manner of nasty precipitation. We read newspapers and did crossword puzzles and watched song birds pick seeds from the feeder outside the porch. Each of us calling out in turn, “It’s a cardinal, now a gold finch, now a nuthatch.”
It was comfortable, easy, because we share books and film and art and food. The dog amused us with her shameless clowning for attention, tossing her ball into coffee cups and chewing her bone on slippered feet. And after some good natured disagreement we googled the proper pronunciation for the word ‘ascetic’. Agreeing that none of us could ever be convinced to renounce our worldy goods and live closer to the bone.
Having read a few blogs where in-laws are villains, malicious and grudging folk who make their daughter in-laws’ lives a great agony, I am aware that I have much to be thankful for on this score. Though my in-laws may descend rather spontaneously and with great collections of clippings and books and DVD’s in tow (there is nary a countertop or table unlittered while they’re here) they also bring a great dose of generosity and love towards my children, a patience for our slow-paced weekends without schedule or planned events and a comfort that I have chosen well.
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10 Responses to “i’m lucky”
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I’m so glad that your in-laws are cool (in a relative sense).
Over here? Let’s just say that things are a bit trickier and leave it at that.
You’re such a lucky woman. Not that my in-laws are mean or what. They’re just not as cool as yours.
:-)
You don’t just marry your spouse, you marry their family.
I’m unlucky that cce moved to north.
do you think your in-laws want to adopt me? they reminded me of my parents, who are both gone now.
I don’t pretend the lives of few dozen Virginia Tech students are more important than any others. Still, personal experience causes me to feel their deaths while the deaths of Darfur’s children remain distantly and amorphous.
I don’t feel lucky right now. I feel sad.
They sound like very cool in-laws.
I watched ‘When The Levee Broke’ a few weeks ago & was stunned. I mean I thought I’d seen the worst of that, but there was sooo much more. Stunned.
Would you rent them out, please?
When I married my husband (who I love dearly), one of my friends commented that after watching my new in-laws she planned to marry an orphan.
this a good example of giving credit where credit is due.
this is karmic, i believe.
this bodes well for your future as an in-law.
they sound fabulous. sherrybaby was terrific.